So I’ve been sat here for the last half an hour using google to diagnose myself.  Don’t bristle, I’ll get to a doctors eventually. Whilst I think I’ve turned into a bit of a hypochondriac since being so sick, I am also experiencing a complete aversion to the medical field and doctors.

I’ve been having weird heart things happen lately as well as other symptoms. I’ve been on beta blockers for years, well since about 2005. I had an irregular heart beat back then and what I thought was mad anxiety. Turns out my whole central nervous system was functioning at about double the normal rate, making me feel like I was going to explode a lot (& not in a good way). I had all the usual tests and was put on these beta blockers, which fixed me up good and proper. Til now. I’m still on those little red tablets, but I find that my heart rate gets out of control from time to time and I get dizzy when I exercise.

So I really do need to go and get it checked out.

But do you understand my reticence? After all the trauma of the first part of this year I simply can’t force myself to do anything. My personal trainer has been at me for weeks now to do something. She pleaded tonight, saying if something happened she’d be upset. I guess there’s a few people who would be. Still not sure about going though.

I’m a firm believer in the old saying “Ignorance is bliss”. Yup. And I know I’m a fool.

I had a fall the other day, or is that what you say when you’re elderly?  I fell over?  I went flying in a most spectacular fashion?  Well I did. It was quite amusing after I realised I’d not broken anything and all that was dented was my ego.  I tripped over an edging on the footpath and flew forward at a great rate and landed on the grass and rolled. Most awesome. Unfortunately I jarred my back in doing so and I have a big knot that needs poking. I also pinged my surgical scar.  I think I got away lightly however. We share our building with a churchy group and one of the women there did something similar and she broke both her arms. I’m too boofy to break anything!

Ooh, in exciting news, my receptionist has got free tickets to see Russell Brand on Friday night and she’s asked me to go with her. Should be a funny night. Last time I saw him he was really good and I enjoy his maniacal brain.

I am over it being the silly season already. I’ve seen so many car accidents in the last few weeks. I’m sure it’s because people are rushing about, not concentrating, tired. Yesterday I was walking up Clarendon St with a client when a truck took out the front section of a car who was doing a hook turn at the wrong moment. For those who don’t know what a hook turn is, click on the linky bit.

clear as mud?

clear as mud?

Admittedly, they’re a little confusing. However this woman had got herself into the right (or left) position to turn. Her fatal error was not waiting for the lights she was facing to turn red and to wait for the sign to tell her to go. She turned IN FRONT OF the truck. The poor truckie barely had time to sound his horn before he took out her car. Thankfully two things were in her favour. One was she only got part way into her turn instead of side on and secondly the speed limit is only 40km/h. Still, it’s scary when stuff like that happens right in front of you, literally 10 metres away.  I do a lot of driving in my job and I always hate this time of year as the roads become more like mine fields.

I saw my sister on Friday and her pregnancy is going well.  She’s got a lovely little belly and given her due date of February is fast approaching she’s making lots of plans. I’m just planning to be the best Aunty ever.  I’m rather excited about the whole thing, I’m hoping she lets me be involved and hands on.

Anyways, I’ve got my usual post work out chills so I think I need to go and have a bath in my tiny little bath tub. Pretty sure my arms are going to be painful tomorrow. The rest of my week is ridiculously busy with work, so going to take this chance to chill out and relax.

I put my tree up!

I put my tree up!

Nan's orchid - she loves these buggers

Nan’s orchid – she loves these buggers

Nan's rose that she says looks like parchment paper

Nan’s rose that she says looks like parchment paper

cool view of oleander (and my lilly white leg)

cool view of oleander (and my lilly white leg)


~ by Fen on December 4, 2012.

10 Responses to “hypochondriac?”

  1. Isn’t it weird how when one gets older, you call it, “A fall”. But as you say, you just fell over… makes ya sound old ‘n decrepit if you say a fall.

    I wont say nuffink about your reticence to go to the docs. But doesn’t stop me worrying about you.

    I had similar side effects when I was put on Oxycontin. Thought I was having a heart attack. Turns out I’m allergic to it. :/

    Those ‘hook’ turns are WEIRD!!!! We don’t have them here, and it freaked me the fuck out when I was in Melbourne and saw people do them. I was like, “WHAAAAAAAAAT?!??!?!”
    How do people not run into one another normally is beyond me.
    Perhaps the person who was in the accident was from out of town?

    • Thanks for worrying you ratbag.

      Hook turns are weird but I grew up with them, so they don’t bother me. But I can see how confusing they’d be to anyone else.

  2. Not even the flashing Wait was enough for the woman to work out what to do.

    I do get your reluctance to get a diagnosis, but you know you will have to do it sooner or later. Set a date in a few weeks and get used to the idea, then maybe bring it forward, if you can.

    Oleander is under-rated with bad rap because you can’t eat it, or possibly, touch it, but its never been a problem for me.

    • I’ll do it after Christmas Andrew, I’ll get there.

      Oleander is amazing, I love it. You can touch it but you can’t eat it or it will poison you. Mind you, you’d have to ingest a whole lot of really really bitter tasting leaves to do so!

  3. Please take care.

    Some medicine I take effects my balance, that and being clumsy means that I fall over more than I should.

    When I was in Melbourne three years ago, I watched in amazement at the hook turns. I just don’t see how that is a good idea. Sorry.

    • I will take care, thanks.
      I’d hate for my balance to be affected, I’m a bit of a klutz at the best of times

  4. I hope you get sorted Fen! Not nice feeling like that. I get dizzy spells and the heart thing completely, but mine is due to being hyperthyroid (graves disease). Have you had BT’s for your thyroid (TSH, T4 & T3)?

    Those hook turns scared me so much, I used to go the long way round so I could avoid doing them. They IZ not normal, I tells ya.

    • Yep Brooke i’ve had more thyroid tested more times than I care to think about. It’s always been fine. Just my weird body being weird, as usual.

  5. I understand your reluctance to go back to the medics but, I think you knew this even as you wrote this blog, you’ll have to. Better sooner than later.

  6. It probably is time for the doctor again, even if to go through the stressful-enough process of learning that nothing is wrong with you (I hope).

    Weird how we seem to be in the city on the same nights. We drove past Rod Laver and saw the Russell Brand banner but we went to see Primal Scream. I was hanging out for months and even cut my trip short for the gig, but they were flat and missing something and I felt awful for not enjoying it.

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